I’ve always been told that I was very mature for my age. In my actions, my thoughts, mindsets and even my speech. To be honest it used to bother me when I was younger and even does in my older years. The fear of always being the “granny” of the group or the “second mum” amongst the gang used to get to me. I don’t know if it is the fear of God or of my parents being deeply instilled in me or the fact that I learned to think individually over the years, and I guess that’s how I matured so easily.
Upon seeing an IG post the other day, discussing growth and maturing in all aspects of your life, and listening to an amazing clubhouse room on friendships and adulting, I was inspired to write this post after having writer’s block for so many weeks (the struggle is real). Signs, hints, signposts or whatever you would like to call it that confirms that you’ve experienced growth or are currently experiencing it.
You’re not led by other people anymore.
With growth comes independence. Gone are the days of following others, trends and styles and here are the days of leaning on your own intuition. I find that I’m not usually influenced by a lot nowadays and it takes a lot to sway me. I’ve started to take a strong stance on certain issues and outlooks on life, and if you find you are doing the same then maybe this is a sign that you are maturing and seeing life with a new perspective. I think this happens for a lot of people, you grow out of that stage of seeking validation or approval from others and you start to stand on your own two feet a bit more.
You are falling off some friendships and making new ones.
This one hit me hard when I realised this. I had to take a step back, especially after listening to that clubhouse room and realise I am all about quality then quantity when it comes to friends. I love friendship and I think it’s a beautiful thing to have, however the thing about maturing is realising that you have to let some friendships go if they don’t add value or if it drains you from a fulfilled life. Thriving friendships, in my opinion require time and effort (believe me I’m on season 5 of Girlfriends and I feel tired from even watching an episode) therefore you would want a friendship that is not casual but purposeful in your life. Your circles may begin to look smaller or close-knit and you may be thinking about the people you want in your life more.
You are taking accountability for yourself.
This is a huge one for me. In any area of your life whether it be with your friendships, relationships or within yourself. Doing reviews over yourself and seeing whether you may have met your goals or targets for the year had become a part of your regular routine. You may have accountability partners in your life to keep you on track, but if you have begun to pride yourself on self-discipline then that is a good sign that you are growing or maturing. I find that I check myself much more often than in the past, when I’m stepping out of line or faced with something that may go against my values as a person. If you find that you do this, then it’s a pretty good sign of growth and maturity.
You are becoming your own parent.
I think university life taught me this enough, without Mum and Dad being at your neck asking you every hour if you’ve eaten or what your plans are for today. But I think one vital sign of growth is looking after your wellbeing and valuing self- care a lot more. I love my self-care Sundays and I always show my IG fam what I get up to as it is truly a day for me to treat myself and take care of my inner being. I do find myself becoming like a bigger parent who wants to take care of her a newborn. I’m starting to put my happiness and wellbeing first, and I think through this lockdown phase it has been the same for the majority of people. If you don’t take care of yourself then who will!
You value time- you really do.
If I don’t say the phrase “there’s not enough time in a day for me” at least 5 or 6 times, then I guess that day was really well spent. Now this is a mindset that I am battling with in terms of whether it is healthy or not, but it’s the mindset I currently have. I am now at an age where I realise that time is truly precious, and I want each day to be well spent. If you feel as if you plan out your day to make sure it is as productive as possible then this may be a sign of you appreciating your time- especially taking out things that wastes it.
I’m sure there are many more signs of growth and each one may be tailored to an individual person, but I believe the ones listed here are relatable. What do you think?
Thanks for reading!